Posts tagged ‘father’

and so it begins

This is the last day with dad. If today is anything like the other last days of his other visits it will be filled with laughter and smiles that are tinged by sorrow and dread. We will make the best of it, but unlike the first day of the visit, full of excitement and anticipation, the last day is heavy with knowing what lies ahead.

My father will return to his life that he loves, his beautiful house, his routine walks in the woods, and his rich career, a life that is awesome, aesthetically pleasing and accomplished, but something will be missing. He won’t have granddaughters in his midst and the permanent grin they bring to his face. He also won’t have his daughter to walk beside, to calm his soul by being near.

And I will return to our normal life. We will go grocery shopping, to play group, and to the river, loving our girls, our friends, and this majestic valley we are nestled within. But we won’t have a grandpa in our midst. We won’t have that extra comfort of one more person that loves us with all his considerable might.

It’s great having a dad that loves so much, so willingly. Every father’s day I thank him for how he has been with us, for providing a model to follow. I have thriving adult relationships because he has shown me what it feels like to be loved in a complete way. He has always been a large, powerful figure, smiling achingly in our direction. He pumps his fist in exhilaration when we reach our goals, he grabs his heart in pain when we meet with sorrow. He has always been this way, a current of undying love.

To be near him feels good. It’s really as simple as that.


May 25, 2010 at 7:56 am 3 comments

empathy delivery


Welcome to the weekend friends.

My father and sister have gone and I am so sad. I kissed them goodbye and then sat down to write this as a way of soothing myself. By giving love and empathy to you, I also give it to myself. So here goes. I hereby present a beautiful bundle of empathy to any and all:

  • that long to be with a particular someone, or set of someones, every day, and due to distance, can not.
  • that have had a special week and are not looking forward to a “normal” day.
  • that feel tired.
  • that are cleaning up poop and pee several times a day as they potty train their child.
  • that are in tooth pain, having tooth worries, or facing impending, costly, dental work.
  • that are in store for a long day of travel.
  • that teach a class early on saturday mornings.
  • that live their life in relation to autism.
  • that ordered food at a restaurant and then later didn’t want that food, and their parents still wanted them to eat it.
  • that are allergic to dogs and even have to wear a ventilator to enjoy dinner parties at houses with dogs.
  • that are experiencing changes at their job.
  • that have a dog that is getting older and it’s starting to show.

I hope this helps.

November 6, 2009 at 5:02 am 4 comments

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